6/6/15

Coming Home

We aren't dead! We are alive and well. I have been meaning to write this post for WEEKS but it just kept getting away from me. But I am here now so lets get started.

SO WE HAD ANOTHER BABY.

And although this post was suppose to cover the first week home, it has now turned into the first month. Ha!

When Geddy came to meet Scout at the hospital the day she was born, we had a little gift for him to open. It was just a set of cool guys and monsters, which he really likes. Although he was excited, he explained that he really wanted the Dragon that was pictured on the back of the toys' box. Funny Boy. He came in the room with Grandma Glenna and was really calm and sweet (I think Grandma had explained that he needed to be calm which was so good). And he went over and said things like "Baby Sister" and "Baby Scout" in a soft, sweet, voice. He did a really good job. 

Our last day at the hospital, waiting for Dad to pick us up!

And many have asked how Geddy has been with the new baby. He has truly loved her, smothering her with kisses and love and pretending to tickle her and getting so close to her face and just laughing. He really really likes her. He has, however been pretty mad with Mom and Dad. He has taken any frustration to the change out on his parents. And ultimately, I have been glad that it's been that way and not towards the baby but one of the HARDEST parts of the first 3 weeks was the strain on my and Geddy's relationship. I didn't expect that but it was really emotionally hard. I felt Mother's guilt CONSTANTLY. I was so sad for my little dude. It was probably harder on me than him but it was definitely a challenge. And it has been a hard challenge up to about this week. Things are now starting to settle a bit and Geddy seems to be adapting. It's not perfect but it has felt better. 

Geddy picked out the flowers for me and Scout. 

On the day to come home, Chad came to pick me and Scout up from the hospital with Geddy and some flowers that they picked out for us. It was so cute. It totally made my heart explode. I love my boys so much and I was really happy to see them. It was amazing to see us now as a family of 4. 

Ready to come home!

We do have an issue with the car. Scout, much like her brother, hates her car seat unless she is asleep. And Geddy doesn't like it when Scout cries, it makes him really nervous for her and anxious and even, I'd say, panicky. So when Scout screams in the car for a minute, Geddy's energy elevates and he yells and screams and uses his monster voice telling Scout to "stop crying" or "Mom get the baby!". It's a stressful situation and it happens often so I have been working on staying calm myself and teaching Geddy to stay calm too. It's a work in progress :)

The first day home!

Once we got home, the chaos began! Haha, there was a moment where the dog was barking and the baby was crying and Geddy was panicking because of the baby crying and me and Chad looked at each other with big eyes and said "we are really doing this".  The shell shock was pretty significant and stressful at times. New babies really turn your world upside down, regardless of how prepared you are. I can't tell you how grateful I was for Chad while he stayed home with us. I literally could NOT do it without him. He basically took care of Geddy by himself and did an amazing job taboot. He also let me sleep a bunch in between feedings. Our parent's also came to the rescue so many times. Bringing us countless meals and taking Geddy for sleepovers or for the day so that he could have some fun. My goodness, we couldn't' have done it without THEM. 

Geddy with Scout's "Birth Day" cake. 

Geddy loves Birthdays. He loves the candles on the cake and the singing. It's a special time for him regardless of whose Birthday it actually is. Chad had a great idea of pulling out some extra cake we had in the freezer and doing a "Birth Day" celebration for Scout. We knew that would be special for Geddy so we put candles in the cake and sang Happy Birthday to Scout and Geddy blew out the candles. He loved it. Our goal was to do everything we could to make Geddy love Scout being around. 

After her first night home she slept ALLLLL day.

So let's talk about sleeping. That first night home was ROUGH. I think I got like 2 hours of sleep. My milk STILL hadn't come in and she was acting pretty dang hungry so we were doing some formula while also nursing. And this girl does NOT like to sleep alone. She also had her fussy time from like 2-6am where she was awake and sleeping in and out but wouldn't let me put her down. I remember Geddy did the same thing at first, it's SO hard but she quickly got out of that. It was also difficult because Geddy's room is right next to the nursery so he would have a hard time when she would wake up in the night. He would yell at us to "get the baby!" because he was worried about her in the wee hours of the morning. But he has started to sleep through it now. So that was hard but I soon fell into a pretty decent routine and now at 1 month, I am getting a LITTLE more sleep. Nothing great but more. I will discuss more on this in my next post.

More pictures of her sleeping...

Nursing. I was SO nervous about nursing. With Geddy, I had flat nipples so I had to use a nipple shield. And although I tried multiple times to wean him off it, it was too stressful and I just didn't have the gusto to change it so we used a nipple shield for a full 10 1/2 months (Geddy weaned himself at that point). But I am SO grateful to announce that we are having much better success this time around. Scout has been a good latcher from the get go. She had a really strong suck as well and so we have had quite a bit of success. When we went to her 2 week appointment, she had gained back her birth weight and then some (she was at 8lbs 15oz at her 2 week appt, she gained an extra 2oz!). That was a major relief. When my milk first came in, I was SO engorged because I was producing WAY more than she needed (I had been consistently pumping to get my supply up) and I have a pretty zealous let down so we really had to adapt to the forceful flow of milk. Poor girl was basically drinking from a fire hose (being blasted away!), we still sometimes have issues with it. But I am so grateful to have so much milk to feed my baby! It is an awesome blessing. And all without a nipple shield! Huzzah!

...and more sleeping...


Recovery! As I explained in Scout's Birth Story, we were able to have a successful VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section) which I really wanted. It was a major blessing but I knew the recovery would be different. I must say it was WAY easier. I hope the rest of my deliveries are vaginal because it's a lot better. Don't get me wrong, it still hurts like hell sometimes but it's much quicker and you're more mobile sooner. I also feel like my stomach and uterus deflated faster. I feel like a vaginal recovery makes it easier to be a Mom to a new baby. With that said, I am incredibly grateful for my C-section because it saved my son's life. More on that point of view later (I plan to write a post about how I feel about both delivering methods, we'll see if that happens). And lastly, Adult Diapers? They are a God send. Just embrace them. 

Geddy building Lego Robots with Mama!
Lookin' for bugs at the park.
Found a Lady Bug.
Making Butterflies with Mama!

One of the reasons why this last week has gone better with Geddy was because I have dedicated Mama time with him each day (and I have felt more comfortable going out for VERY short outings with both the babies). Geddy is such a GOER. He needs stimulation and interaction and so getting down on his level at least once a day with him is so crucial. So, I will wrap Scout in the Solly Wrap after I have fed her and then I take 30 minutes to just play with Geddy. Scout usually just falls asleep during that time so it allows me to really focus on my little dude. We usually just play with toys but we did a craft where we made Butterflies out of empty toilet paper rolls and construction paper. Geddy loved it. Are there any other crafts that your toddlers have loved? I would love some good ideas! 

Also, this last week, I went out of the house with both children as well which was a MIRACLE. When Geddy was a newborn, I would have never imagined going out with him this soon. He was a very different baby and I was so out of my comfort zone. Now, I can't say that I am completely comfortable and the outings are maybe 30-45 minutes longs (not including driving time) but the need is really there. Our day (aka, mine and Geddy's relationship) is so much better if we get out. We have gone to the park a few times, then on another day we went to get Geddy's haircut. Just simple things.  I couldn't do any of it without the Solly wrap though. It has saved me because I use it each day and every time I go out (it's nice because I feel like she is more protected wrapped to me from germs and stuff. That may seem silly but it does help me feel better about it). Baby wearing for the win! 

Now, let me be clear, even though it may sound like I am a super awesome Mom who does activities and goes out every day and has it all together, let me tell you what is not pictured above. The countless hours we have spent watching TV/movies during this transition. A whole lot. 

Baby wearing at the park!

And there you have it. That kind of covers our first Month of Scout's life. Overall, we are doing good. My anxiety has been pretty stable (although it gets worse when I don't get quite enough sleep, which happens more at the end of the week. Luckily, Chad is stellar and lets me nap when he gets home from work). My recovery is still going really well (at least to my knowledge). We are all adapting, it's still really hard at times but it's getting easier. Mostly, we just feel really blessed to have these two beautiful children. 

Oh and for those who ask, Bobbie has done amazingly with the new baby. She honestly prefers young babies over scary toddlers. She has had NO problem with her at all. I would even say she likes the baby. And she likes that we have been home so much, haha. 

I will be posting all about Scout here in the next little while. I'll go a little more detail about how she is different and how having a second child compares to having a first. So stay tuned for that. 

Happy Friday!

Hil  

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